28 September 2006
Inexplicable. Intangible.
Isn't it beautiful how these words can represent that exact inadequacy to explain and quantify in the first place?
How they fill the gap between what we feel and what we understand.
In my mp3 player, zenny (not the most
creative of names, I know), there's a playlist titled
autumn.
And in it, there are songs which I think suit the mood of fall - melancholic, quietly intense.
Only I play it on sunny days, cloudy days, rainy days - every possible variation that Singapore's weather can come up with (which clearly, exhausts itself after three options, but I digress).
And the songs in it, ranging from Bell X1's
Eve, the Apple of my Eye to Jenny Lewis's
You Are What You Love to Rilo Kiley's
With Arms Outstretched, always give me this intangible, inexplicable sense of...
calm, mixed with a tinge of sadness, and optimism.
12:32 AM;
25 September 2006
Why do people have to be this lonely? What's the point of it all? Millions of people in this world, all of them yearning, looking to others to satisfy them, yet isolating themselves.
Why? Was the world put here just to nourish loneliness?
Haruki Murakami, Sputnik Sweetheart
Somedays, I'm good. I ride on a rush of jubilation. I feel invincible.
Other days, it wriggles its way into my consciousness, and I can feel a gaping absence in me.
Then there are days when it is a freaking black hole I couldn't possibly ignore, and it takes all I can not to be dragged right in.
Never has an absence been more keenly felt.
Never has loneliness had this much company.
6:51 PM;
22 September 2006
And here I present, the dopest issue of NYLON yet!
Kirsten Dunst, Jenny Lewis, Cory Kennedy...3 of my most favourite people in the world!!!
Gahh...can it get any better?
10:10 PM;
I am thinking it's a sign That the freckles in our eyes Are mirror images and When we kiss they're perfectly aligned And I have to speculate That God himself did make us into Corresponding shapes like puzzles pieces From the clay True, it may seem like a stretch But it's thoughts like this That catch my troubled head When you're away, when I am missing you to death When you were out there on the road For several weeks of shows And when you scan the radio I hope this song will guide you home They will see us waving from such great heights "Come down now," they'll say But everything looks perfect from far away "Come down now," but we'll stay I've tried my best to leave This all on your machine But the persistent beat Sounded thin upon listening That frankly will not fly You will hear the shrillest highs And lowest lows with the windows down When this is guiding you home They will see us waving from such great heights "Come down now," they'll say But everything looks perfect from far away "Come down now," but we'll stay...- Such Great Heights
My favourite song of the moment - not the version by The Postal Service but Iron & Wine's.
Had it on repeat on the way home from school yesterday and it was just...
heart-breaking.
3:39 PM;
17 September 2006
Every time it's a different perspective.
Laughter; silliness; joy.
Good times. Some captured on film. Some in our memory.
But good times all the same.
11:47 PM;
15 September 2006
People always complain about how long the journey from yck to khatib is. But I love to lean against the glass pane in the train and gaze out at the reservoir.
When it's sunny, the waters pick up the rays and shimmer.
When it's evening, the sky takes on a purplish tinge, and the waters is a silky lavender. And in the horizon, you could hardly tell where one ends and the other begin.
But my favourite is when it's drizzling and the sky's grey, and the misty rain makes the waters look almost silver. Everything's so tranquil. The jetty stands forlorn, and the trees become a teal blur in the background.
1:05 PM;
11 September 2006
Now, now, now, what I would give to be a Luella girl...
8:52 PM;
10 September 2006
Oh yeah, and it's time for New York Fashion Week - spring '07!
What I'm looking out for:
10/9 Sun -
Lela RoseTwinkle
Jovovich-Hawk DVF
Luella Bartley (!!!)
11/9 Mon - Carolina Herrera
Cynthia Steffe
Oscar de la Renta
Luca Luca Proenza Schouler Marc Jacobs (!!!)
12/9 Tue -
Monique LhuillierBill Blass
Derek Lam (my beloved!) Behnaz Sarafpour
Betsey Johnson
Marc by Marc (!!!) Rodarte
Nanette Lepore
Narciso Rodriguez 13/9 Wed -
Peter SomTravota (!!!) Anna Sui
14/9 Thu - J. Mendal
Vena Cava
Vera Wang Temperley Calvin Klein
Zac Posen
15/9 Fri - Ralph Lauren
Erin Fetherston Doo.Ri
5:05 PM;
09 September 2006
It wasn't Central Park. It wasn't fall; there was no autumn foliage.
But there was our usual crazy chatter. There's Summer the Dog, and her nice, old owner.
There's your favourite lamp post that is the only moldy one in the row.
There was no black swans but white's beautiful too.
Only thing missing was your mermaid pose.There's the endless photo opportunities.
Me a prune, you a pig."I'd rather look deranged or ugly, then look nice and pleasant."There's our picnic spot right in the middle of the grassy patch.
There's our vow to head straight there the next time the sky's grey and it's about to rain.
And for all that and more, I'm content.
1:56 AM;
08 September 2006
A few nights ago as I tried tucking my sister into bed.
"Hey bao bao, do you want a goodnight kiss?"
Blanket is pulled over face, no reply.
"Come on, I came to tuck you into bed."
Eyes peep out, a stricken look, and visible shivering.
"Oh bao bao, why are you shivering? Were you having a nightmare?"
Shaking finger emerges from blanket. Fixed on yours truly.
"You...you...you are the nightmare."
Next day,
"You know, last night, I dreamt that I was sitting at a table with my friends and some guys. Then, suddenly, the guys disappeared or turned into girls!! What do you it means?"
"I think it's clearly a very ominous sign. You're probably gonna end up a spinster like me."
"I think it's because you tucked me into bed last night. You caused the nightmare."
"Well then, maybe I should include that goodnight kiss tonight. For good measure, you know?"
2:47 AM;
04 September 2006
You know what grates me the most?
You know what just
kills me?
It's knowing that all my FAVOURITE bands are touring and I can't watch them live!!!
No bloody concerts in Singapore.
No music festivals in Singapore.
Yeah, I'm just glad we can actually buy their cds here.
If not online, then at
exorbitant prices from HMV.
Only to have to turn to youtube,
and satisfy my cravings there.
And it's just sad that we'll never get that same kind of euphoria
you see in music fests everywhere.
Massive crowdssinging their guts out alongwith the leadeyes widescreaming at the frenetic riffsfingers, toes twitchingsweat flyingbodies tooOk, i'm not making this any easier for myself.
11:29 PM;
02 September 2006
Brilliant time at Sentosa yesterday!
Slow, slumbering ride to Harbourfront on 963. Clear skies and sunshine at Palawan Beach. Mat spread out on the sand.
No volleyball, sunbathing, or swimming for us. We read magazines and laugh at the antics of little boys. And Malay boys shrieking gibberish in
"Italian",
"Spanish", and
"Japanese" as they play soccer. Pretty international team we got there.
Chilled out at Coffee Bean. Marvelled at the idea of a team manager without a team. Pondered on the million-dollar question. Scambled around taking shots of the sunset. The best location? In the toilet. I'm sure there's a point to be made there - the most magnificent view of sunset in the humblest of places. But nah, let's not go there.
Night falls as we climbed up the tower. Twinkling lights across. Palm trees took on sinister shapes in the dark. Rats darted around and committed suicide. We fled across the bridge.
Dinner at the hawker centre at Harbourfront bus interchange. Yummy char kway teow, hokkien mee, prawn noodles, and sugarcane juice for all. Cheers!
Headed to the Esplanade where a band was playing. Old rocker ah peks and their wives in the audience. Bobbing their heads to the music, their wives gazing fondly at them. Aww...
To my beloved
han zi gongs, I love you both!
8:23 PM;